everytime i think about life, world and those related things...i cant help but to feel down. maybe a bit depressed. the world has been going on for a long time. yes it is so old that a lot of changes occurred. from a what i see human is just a small creature in this world compared to the vastness of this universe. that's when i see people complain about their everyday life, all the problems and hassles seems so petty. the conflicts about money, political stuffs, love, and all. they are just nothing. that's when i get tired listening to people whining about their problems. not that i dont want to help anyway. some people think that they are so great in this world achieving great feat when they did nothing at all but just walk on the earth. all these makes me feel like what im doing for my whole life is pointless and end up in vain. will i be able to give impact to this world? doubt it.
when i look back, our life is not that long. heck 100 years is not even that long. even now, when i look at myself in the mirror i see myself getting old. wonder how long will i be able to live? after all, death is inevitable. then i started to think, what if i become immortal? what would i do if become immortal?
immortality doesnt sound absurd actually but that will happen after the judgement day. now now thinking like this makes me feel like it is better to abandon everything and only serve the god for He who decide where we shall go after we die (though that i shouldnt do that)
Motherhood is hard.
1 week ago